The journey has just begun


I am sitting on my bed and my four and a half month’s old little princess is mellowly sleeping next to me. While sleeping, she exhibits oodles of facial expressions like joy, laughter, anger, fear, etc. in one go. I think she might be fantasizing about the fairies and their tales in her dreams. In this mellifluous moment along with sweet sounding soft breaths, I just thought to pen down the journey of my motherhood till now which has just begun….

The Journey has just begun with those two pink lines. Those two lines have an inbuilt power to impart a feeling of excitement and anxiety at the same time. The sensation of being a creator of new life, snuggled in my tummy, is strong enough to give me goose bumps. The little one inside is a tiny piece of me and will be here in this world because of me. The miniature version of me always responded in chorus from within by way of kicks and punches according to my secret tête-à-tête with him/her, my spectrum of emotions, uttering his/her likes or dislikes on my intakes during food cravings, dancing to the beats of the music I was listening, etc. The tuneful heartbeat of baby, positioned in my womb, was inspiring during my pre natal visit. The mini me was on his/her way and soon I was going to feel a love that cannot be comprehended.  But trust me, the movement of little life inside your bump is one of the best feelings a woman could ever experience in her upcoming journey to motherhood.

The Journey has just begun with the not so easy but breathtaking arrival of a little bundle of joy, my daughter. She is me…… she’s more than me. This was such a supernatural transformation. From an immature girl to a mature lady. I have made a human. The echo of her first cry marks her arrival. A mother is born along with her baby. This is the first and the last time a mother is happy when her child cries. The first glimpse of my angel, while coming out of the labour room on the stretcher, was miraculous enough for rolling down my tears out on my cheeks. Miraculous enough…….because I have not shed a single tear during the whole unfamiliar laborious natal process. I have felt not so tired and so in love almost in unison before in my whole life. The charisma of my cute sweetie has effortlessly enforced me to set eyes on her endlessly and has left me speechless and sleepless entire night in spite of so much of exhaustion.

The Journey has just begun with gently swaying my darling who is soundly sleeping in my lap to falling fast asleep in my arms. The warmth of her little arms cosily embraced around my neck establishes a kind of divine connection straight away. Her tousled and warm little head, after having a bath, relaxing on my shoulder loads me with a sense of responsibility. It’s like her totally entrusting me for her nurture and survival.

The Journey has just begun with my sugar flashing sweet reflexes to real ones on her rosy chubby cheeks. One of the most precious moments of motherhood for me is her big dazzling toothless gummy grin from ear to ear with cheeks lifted up and wrinkles forming at the corners of the eyes. Further, a dimple on the left side of the upper lip is just like a cherry on the top of icing on the cake. I am juvenilely excited to sing flat and tuneless songs, make crazy noises, mimicking different sounds, having hush-hush talks, creating funny and mad faces, playing peek-a-boo, etc. just and just to see her cracking a smile and giggling. I, at the age of 32, love playing foolish, nah…….being foolish, beaming her back stupidly, babbling loudly and what not, only to see my cutie glimmering and sparkling.

The Journey has just begun with the explosion of cuteness in their all-embracing facial expressions. It may be her eyes popping out or zooming in/out along with raised or lowered eyebrows and slightly opened mouth in fascination; or may be going all-out for seeking attention by crying and yelling. In addition, it may include her red faced yowling, squealing, closing eyes narrowly in anger or her hands/face quivering in fear. It may also include nodding her head from right to left or left to right just like a pellet drum or pouting and posing before a camera with a range of expressions, after all she knows it all. The satisfied look on her face with a cunning smile after her every two hour meals signifying like “Mom, I thoroughly enjoyed your tasty milk and surely I am going to have it more”.  One of my favourite expressions is her giving me an intense wide-eyed stare that too with an attitude and it feels like oh my god, seriously, is she checking me out??? The funniest one is her looking like being lost in deep thoughts or like something spreading out uncontrollably while peeing and going potty. And the list is endless…….

The Journey has just begun with my precious small gem, which is so much pure and natural in her irresistible persona. The enigmatic aroma that she possesses has the power to relief all my worries in just a few moments. Her superfast bicycle ride through her chubby and sexy legs and her gleaming eyes on seeing me or when I am around her is just like an energy drink for me to drive away any kind of drowsiness. The softness of her tiny hands, while approaching me and getting familiar with my face, is so much soothing to melt down my heart in just a second. On the contrary, her punches on my faces on any disturbance while she is sleeping or for reaching me while I am sleeping always keeps me imagining about her strength. Nowadays, certain cuddling sessions with her including devouring with kisses is the best form of meditation for me. Trust me, every child is a born magician who has the superpower to heal anything and anything means anything.

The Journey has just begun with this deadlock moment when my little beloved called me “Me-Me” loud and clear and that too on my birthday last month in January. At first instant, I thought it was just her cooing or imitating my intonation I was having with her, while completing my daily routine tasks in the morning. But no man, she said it again within a second and the very moment I turned and reached her, the shimmer in her eyes and the gleeful smile on her face confirmed it. This is it……. The moment was so strong enough to left me awestruck and plastered with the corners of my eyes wet. A moment of pride, a moment of surprise, a moment of privilege, a moment of thrill, a moment of responsibility, a moment of trustworthiness and what not. I swear on my God, this is the best birthday gift ever and one of the greatest achievements in my whole life from my little gorgeous sweetheart to her “Me-Me”.

The Journey has just begun with the beautiful master stroke of luck by God on choosing my petite bud to be mine and delegating me with a huge responsibility for allowing it to blossom as it should be. In my opinion, the only way to express my gratitude towards Him is to be with her all the time as she needs me for all her needs. And I must tell you “Being needed so much” by the little one in her every single moment is the most rewarding phenomenon of parenthood. I just want to breathe and live each and every moment with her to its fullest as this phase of her and mine will never come back again. So, I always try my best to capture and treasure every single moment in my memory box as she won’t be baby forever. She will grow up into a toddler in about a seven months time, when she will turn one. Then, somewhere down the memory lane in future, these moments will be mesmerizing and cherishing me to the core. These moments will always be close to my heart and I will desperately miss them but in consolation of the next upcoming challenging phase.

So to put the finishing touches to this piece of writing only, as inscribing your sentiments on motherhood can be never ending…

The Endless Journey has just begun with being a mother today and always for my heart beating outside me. The Journey to rejuvenate every second and to learn as the process proceeds, step by step…

The Whole New Journey has just begun with my little companion’s hand holding mine. Only a few milestones have been achieved and many more to hit.

Article contributed by: Bhagyashree


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